Vicious Circle
I just wanna cry! I’m so sad right now, but honestly I don’t know why …

Just a few days ago, she told me or even promised herself to keep up that certain kind of distance to him. That she doesn’t want to stay in such a trustful, personal relationship to him anymore… - but now…

It started with that damn discussions because of that “living” thing! We talked about it for days now! On the one hand, it’s really great to hear that she wants me to live with her, but …
I know, that she doesn’t want to live together with one of the others, and that she also doesn’t want me to live with one of them - just because she’s not sure, how long they will stay friends…- I can’t believe, that she’s for real, coz, you know, he is one of the most important persons in her life - seriously; however, she doesn’t want to live together with him, because she knows, that he’ll be one of the persons who will just pass by in her life!

But on the other hand, she told me that the argument yesterday turned their relationship even into a more personal and trustful one, because he defended her and stand up for her!
Honestly, I think I’m so sad because it just hurts to hear how much she feels for him and how important he is…!

I hate this “living“ discussions, coz there’s really no result and we won’t find a solution as long as we’re treating it like a game. …
Finally, I think it’s just her decision if I’m “leaving” coz apparently, I’ve got no idea what’s really going on with her parents…
>>Well, there are so many things you don’t know and which she doesn’t tell you!