i'm back. yes i'm glad i came. i just love it. not sure what to do about marc though. trying to get him back, but he's hard work. he was so cute to begin with but at nighttime he ignored me completly and was in bed by one. the next days it got better and when i thought "ok, fuck the shyness, tomorrow i just go with him" he became a complete bastard again. the last three days he's beeing weird. massive arguement with his father today. "and what is that with this german girl? she has no character at all, she looks like a piece of bleached rope". its almost a complement to get abused by him, but marc seemed like it was really hard for him to look at me after that. just wish i had any idea what he thinks. or that i could just say "who the fuck cares, i don't need hin, if he doesn't even make the efford to show me if he wants me back" would be better for my self esteem, thats for sure.

unfortunately, he's hotter than i'm proud. too bad...