"Honestly" - "Actually" - "Awesome"
11.04.2004

When did it stop being fun and started being so scary?
Coz it’s really scary. Coz when she’s just not in the right mood and when there isn’t anything special, I’m actually scared of disappointing and even of losing her! I’m afraid that she doesn’t love me anymore, although everything is alright again after a few minutes. Honestly, I’m scared of my own.

It seemed like everything would get out of control, but one message later everything was perfect again. She called me to go out with her and we went to the ice-cream parlour and… - it was just perfect again. It was really perfect and we had so much fun.

And then, today, we spend the whole day together. It was just an awesome day. Although it was also kind of “sad” in some way, because she had a really serious argument with her mum. I felt so sorry for her, coz actually she was crying because of her. I was really surprised, coz I always thought she’s living in this “happy-sunshine-family” without any problems. But even when she was crying, she was still so cute and so lovely.

She’s honestly the best and most important part of my life! I love her so much, that I sometimes think it even kills me!