Italy
What happens in Italy, stays in Italy.

Or so you always thought,.

It's ever been that way and should be for at least one more decade. Unless this time - because you can't just stay silent and put, pretend that some things have never happened. You can't just delete the episode and start all over, because nothing is like it was, not anymore.

You invite him spontaneously. It's part of a mood, part of the frustration you're constantly feeling. It's part of your inner urge to finally get an answer, accelerate everything that seems to be tied, put on ice.

If he accepts, you have your answer - it's as simple as that.

He takes his time - whether from indecision or insecurity, you don't know. Eventually he makes his decision and in the end he's there. He comes to Italy for no other reason but to visit you.
You talk, you do a lot of things together - like sports, like eating, like sleeping. You share a tent, a mattress and sometimes the cover sheet.
He is a hugger, has always been and at some point in the night, in the cover of the darkness, his lips touch yours. Finally - is everything you can think, although the kiss is not at all what you expected. You anticipated familarity, after all you'd kissed before, but you get strangeness. One kiss, that stirrs some strings, gives you food for thought... It stays with the one!
After a few days he is gone and you are still not sure, because you haven't talked about all the things at hand.

The things concerning his intentions towards you and yours towards him. Relationship or affair? You could live with both, no - you have lived with both when it comes down to him. An affair would be just physically, at least it's what an affair in your eyes should be.
However, an affair with him would never be just physically, there is no way. Too much shared history, too much memories, too much feelings in the past…

You'd like to talk about his intentions, but fear the question. Not for the answer, but for every question he might direct at you in the afterwards.

Are you single?

The answer should be simple, taking into account what you've already shared with him, what you do. But it's not as simple as that. Because technically, you aren't. You aren't single and available. Anyway your so called boyfriend lives 500 kilometres away and yeah, that's no reason to cheat on him, but truth is you don't love him. Not anymore, have you ever?

Truth is you haven't seen him in nearly five month, another truth is you haven't had any physical contact since what. One year and a half? Or was it even more? You can't quite remember, it's been ages. Month of physical deprivation, that didn't feel hard at the time, but now - with him and all the memories at hand, it's a different story.

However, you aren't single and though in some way, no in most ways he (your "boyfriend") is just a friend - he thinks that you are his girlfriend - though you are not sure if he isn't although cheating on you.
So perhaps you are lucky, that he hasn't told you his intentions, for he couldn't ask you the same..
Nonetheless when the holidays are over you better have an answer - don`t you think?